The origin of kissing under the mistletoe

The origins of kissing under the mistletoe at Christmas date back to the 17th century. It was believed to possess magical life-giving power and the ability to bring peace between enemies. In Scandinavia, mistletoe was considered a peace plant, under which enemies could declare truce or an arguing married couple could kiss and make peace.

In the 18th century, kissing under mistletoe took on a new meaning. It was believed that a young woman under the mistletoe would not refuse to be kissed, and that a passionate kiss could mean the beginning of a great romance. Conversely, if a woman was not kissed while under the mistletoe, it meant that she would not be able to marry for another year. Needless to say, Christmas for young girls during the 18th century was as full of stress as it was of holiday cheer.

Then, after each kiss under the mistletoe, the man was to pluck the berries from the plant.

According to custom, the mistletoe was not to touch the ground from the time it was cut until Candlemas Day (February 2); sometimes it could remain for the rest of the year to protect the house from lightning or fire, until it was replaced the following Christmas Eve. The tradition spread throughout the English-speaking world, although it is practically unknown in the rest of Europe. In America Phoradendron serotinum is used and in Europe Viscum album.

Mythological origin and associations

Old norse myth

This custom has its origin in a Norse myth told in the Prose Edda, written in the 13th century by Snorri Sturluson. In Norse mythology, Baldur began to have nightmares, and his mother Frigg, goddess of love who could read his dreams, saw that her son was going to die. The gods gathered and listed the things that could kill Baldur. Frigg took the list and went to the nine worlds to make everyone on the list swear an oath that they would not harm her son. All except the mistletoe, as Frigg did not see it as threatening (there are versions where he sees it as too young to swear).

Loki searched for something that would kill Baldur, but not finding it, he spoke to Frigg herself disguised as an old woman. He badgered her until she confessed. Then he fled and took a branch of mistletoe, from which he made an arrow.

Because Frigg had made everyone promise not to harm Baldur, Baldur believed himself invulnerable and asked the gods to throw all the harmful objects they had at him, as they would do nothing to him. Then Loki gave the arrow to Höðr, Baldur's blind brother, helping him to shoot. As expected, the arrow killed Baldur.

Frigg, even knowing that Baldur was doomed, tried to alter his fate. After his death he tried to rescue him from the underworld. In some versions, thereafter the mistletoe became sacred as Frigg vowed that it would never again be used as a weapon, kissing all who stood beneath it. In addition, his tears over the loss of his son became the plant's white berries.

Importance for druids

Druid venerating mistletoe in Johann Georg Keysler's Antiquitates selecta celtic et septentrionales

Mistletoe was considered a magical plant by the Druids, associating it, among other things, with fertility, as its white berries were compared to semen. It was also considered magical because it remained green all year round, while other plants died in winter, and it was customary to take them to their homes during the winter solstice. Pliny the Elder already related it in his Natural History:

Upon this occasion we must not omit to mention the admiration that is lavished upon this plant by the Gauls. The Druids—for that is the name they give to their magicians— held nothing more sacred than the mistletoe and the tree that bears it, supposing always that tree to be the robur. Of itself the robur is selected by them to form whole groves, and they perform none of their religious rites without em- ploying branches of it; so much so, that it is very probable that the priests themselves may have received their name from the Greek name for that tree. In fact, it is the notion with them that everything that grows on it has been sent immediately from heaven, and that the mistletoe upon it is a proof that the tree has been selected by God himself as an object of his especial favour.

The mistletoe, however, is but rarely found upon the robur; and when found, is gathered with rites replete with religious awe. This is done more particularly on the fifth day of the moon, the day which is the beginning of their months and years, as also of their ages, which, with them, are but thirty years. This day they select because the moon, though not yet in the middle of her course, has already considerable power and influence; and they call her by a name which signifies, in their language, the all-healing. Having made all due preparation for the sacrifice and a banquet beneath the trees, they bring thither two white bulls, the horns of which are bound then for the first time. Clad in a white robe the priest ascends the tree, and cuts the mistletoe with a golden sickle, which is received by others in a white cloak. They then immolate the victims, offering up their prayers that God will render this gift of his propitious to those to whom he has so granted it. It is the belief with them that the mistletoe, taken in drink, will impart fecundity to all animals that are barren, and that it is an antidote for all poisons. Such are the religious feelings which we find entertained towards trifling objects among nearly all nations. 

Pliny the Elder. Natural History. XVI.95

According to Julius Caesar's Commentarii de bello Gallico (VI 18, 2), the ceremony described here is considered to have taken place on January 6. On the day considered today as St. John's Eve, the Druids also gathered mistletoe with a golden sickle to initiate a ceremony where animals and humans were sacrificed.

Greco-Roman significance

Not only was it important to the Druids, but it was incorporated into some Greek and Roman myths and stories. The golden branch of Aeneas, the protagonist of Virgil's Aeneid, was a mistletoe. Aeneas was chosen as the progenitor of the Romans. Aeneas decided to visit the underworld, but on his way he passed through a vast and gloomy forest. Two doves led him to a tree with a mistletoe. He took the golden branch and with its flickering light was able to pass through the forest. When he emerged from the forest and showed the branch to the ferryman of the river Styx, they were both immediately transported to the underworld.

Fertility and first recorded kisses

Although few details are known about them, it is believed to have been part of the pagan marriage ceremony. The Anglo-Saxons connected the plant to Freya, the goddess of love and fertility. Freya is a Norse goddess with a particular connection to Frigg suggesting, although no supporting evidence has been found, a common origin. The Anglo-Saxons also brought the plants into their homes, sharing the custom of kissing under it. The oldest documented case of kissing under the mistletoe was in England in the 16th century, apparently already a very popular custom. Over the years, this custom took many forms. In some parts of Europe, it was considered a wedding promise, as well as a prediction of a happy marriage, probably one filled with blessings in the form of children.

Relationship with Christmas, holly and the use of decorative plants.

Mistletoe was a plant with an association with fertility, which led to the association between mistletoe and kissing. But mistletoe is also associated with Christmas. This relationship is common with holly, a red-berried plant with which it is often confused. For this reason, I will now turn the spotlight on holly, which is even more closely associated with this time of year.

Holly (Illex aquifolium) was also used by the Druids because, like mistletoe, it remained green while the sacred oak lost its leaves. Druids would then wear sprigs of holly in their hair. This custom was common with mistletoe.

In the Roman Empire, during the Saturnalia, a carnival festival dedicated to Saturn for seven days, December 17-23, Romans exchanged sprigs of holly, among other plants, and adorned the effigy of the god with them. The Saturnalia was not a festival limited to a place of worship, but could be celebrated anywhere. Even after it was removed from the official calendar it continued as a secular celebration.

Pope Julius I decreed in the 4th century AD that the birth of Jesus should be celebrated on December 25. Several possibilities are suggested for the choice of date:

• Present an alternative to the Saturnalia.
• Celebrate it on the day decreed by Aurelian in 274 AD as Sol Invictus day to gain more conversions by keeping the feast day.
• He assumed that Jesus would die on the anniversary of his conception, March 25 during the third century A.D., so his birth would be nine months later.

Whatever the reason, the reality is that the Saturnalia influenced Christmas with revelry, gambling, food and drink in abundance. In addition, hierarchies were also reversed. It would endure into the Middle Ages as the so-called Feast of Fools or the Kalends. A very famous example of the party is the carnival scene of Clopin in the Disney movie The Hunchback of Notredame (1996).

However, the use of perennial plants, such as laurel, did not survive, as it was banned by Bishop Martin of Braga around 575 AD for being a pagan symbol[1]. It would thus put an end to a custom considered a good omen for the new year. The use of plants as Christmas decorations would not be mentioned again until the end of the 15th century in Italy, according to Polidoro Virgilio, or in Strasbourg, according to two testimonies. It would be in Strasbourg where one of the first Christmas trees would appear a century later. There are also songs and carols during this period in England that point out the decorations with holly, mistletoe, ivy, boxwood or laurel in the parishes.

From then on the tradition would maintain its continuity and the use of these evergreens would converge. In Europe, two types of holly were used. If it was thorny, it announced that the husband would be in charge during the following year. If not, it would be the wife. In England, beekeepers placed them over their hives, considering that they buzzed in honor of the baby Jesus.

As it was linked with the idea of peace and joy, disputes were often settled under the holly. If planted near a house, it was said to ward off witches and protect against storms and lightning. At the head of the bed, it was believed to bring good dreams.

Although, as I said, holly and mistletoe are not the only plants associated with Christmas, they are the most prevalent. Hanging them and the presence of small berries have also facilitated their confusion. As it was a predominantly Northern European custom, it would arrive exclusively in North America, like Thanksgiving and Halloween. The predominance of Anglo-Saxon media has led the rest of the world to associate it with the Christmas season as well. Today they are pitted against the poinsettia, which has a separate history, and the fir tree as plant symbols of Christmas.

Summary

The kiss under the mistletoe has a mythological origin with associations to fertility. Since Roman times, around the winter solstice, decorative perennial plants were used to augur a good year. Despite changes in celebrations and prohibitions, the customs were transformed and survived. In this way, they endured, especially in northern Europe. By extension, these traditions reached North America. It was through the media that the rest of the world began to associate these plants with Christmas.

Notes

1. Martin of Braga. De Correctione Rusticorum: "Non liceat iniquas observationes agere Kalendarum, et otiis vacare gentilibus, neque lauro aut viriditate arborum cingere domos. Omnis haec observatio paganismi est." "To observe vulcanales and calendas, to adorn the tables, to lay laurel wreaths, to observe the foot, to pour into the hearth on the wood fire food and wine, to pour bread into the font, what else is it but devil worship?" This work would also be responsible for the fact that the names of the days of the week in Portuguese had no relation to the pagan gods.

Sources

• Barth, E. (2000). Holly, reindeer, and colored lights: the story of the Christmas symbols. Houghton Mifflin Harcourt.
• Tille, A. (2009). Yule and Christmas. Рипол Классик.